i read this post

"I found that when I lost someone whom I considered the woman of my dreams, that there was much to do within myself to fill that hole. But, I still repeat to myself that if my heart hangs on to her, it will never be open to another. I try to fill myself so I am whole regardless of my partner, so that eventually a new partner who also is working to fill herself will be able to appreciate and understand. We will love not out of need to fill eachother's lacking but because of how we inspire and propel eachother forward. That's the hope that keeps me going, and makes the loss seem like it really was just meant to be, so I could learn to be full in myself."