Thursday, October 8, 2015

Sometimes I feel like
we were tortured lovers in a past life.
I hadn't hurt myself with the idea of you in awhile,
             then out of the depths of im not sure where;
     cosmic or subconscious,
I felt an unresolved pang for you
& maybe you knew that too. 
             I heard what I wanted
& had been waiting to hear.
You described me once as
the excitement & peace of riding a wave;
here I let it all rise & fall again & again,
though I guess we both know how it ends;
words hanging in the air,
              & you leaving them there,
words I exhaust
              because your silence weighs on my spine.
We don't speak. 
We don't touch.
Ego puts on a suit and tie 
but crumbles inside. 
I feel a pull towards familiar.
I taste your words 
              before you slide inside. 
I feel you beside me one last time.
It's all in my head though
& I start to cry.
I leave the room just like you.
When I come back
I see that you've called.
Instead of pushing back buttons 
& changing my voice,
I mourn for this pain
& let this past life die.