Thursday, December 25, 2008

for matt and amy

It started out simply, a connection through wires.

You like The Doors too? Lets see where this goes..

I’m weary of love’s promises and liars.

Are you thinking the same? Maybe it shows..

It began to grow with laughter in the heart.

I want to know more, learn all about you.

Where do you come from, end up and start?

Where will you go and can I come too?

It blossomed with longing and affection.

I like to wake up with you beside me dear.

We can share, make things our collection,

because I miss you even when you're near.

It matured with communication and trust.

These are my habits, bad and good.

Tell me when I’m wrong or unjust,

because for you I’ll do what I should.

It does not grow old but continues to thrive.

We can sit on the couch perfectly content.

With you I’m happy and reminded I’m alive,

because you’re worth the time spent.

Your eyes give me the most wonderful peace,

even when my world is sinking love.

You find the words to give me the sweetest release,

because it’s you I’m always thinking of.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

rambling from freshmen year

My mother groans when I have built a laundry fortress
and my empire continues to expand.
I have her eyes and chin, and that ladder of optimism
she keeps in dark places. I wonder if it will ever break.
I used to make frustrating lines appear on my father’s face
when small loads of sand from my shoes appeared everywhere.
I would like to think that’s how writing is,
infinite grains of ideas, sometimes left in peculiar places, spilling out.
I like to drive to nowhere in particular,
wondering where the other boxes are traveling.
Reading their expressions through the sideways glance,
rushed, sad, nonchalant, and the occasional excitement of a horn.
Always going, going, going,
their heart the constant driver.
They say people come and go in your life,
but I don’t believe so, when I meet the same ones everywhere.
I hear people tell me that I need to take on more responsibilities,
then they laugh and tell me to enjoy not having so many.
I’m young but my excuses are narrowing with time.
I like to catch you off guard in a picture,
When the moment is just right or just wrong
and you are truly you.
I like the rain and its effect on me.
I fall down with it, blend into its chorus,
and carry it with me, even when I have left its side.
Sometimes I am clumsy in body and mind,
but my sense of humor gives me balance.
I love to see through love’s eyes.
I love to make you forget the trivial.
Every time I see that it is 11:11, I wish.
Every time I think of my future, I hope.
I know that life is full of beautiful things,
things I try to understand and make and do.
I know the fire is still burning,
and it can grow or die.
I know I am only a blink in the eye of the world-
but I hope to be a memorable bat of lash-
to those I hold dear.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

to you and you and you

Things that you would like to say to people but couldnt find the words/time/ and/or guts to do so....
Update from time to time

im so happy you're with him, youd be a rockin sister-in-law (this ones kinda obvious)
you were the last blow to my ego. hope you learn not to run from things, and find happiness
leave me alone. i dont need updates on your life and you dont need updates on mine. move on.
i thought you were really fun/seemed cool in high school but weve never hung out.
i think you're the better version of me. i'm glad you guys are together.
i dont think we'll be friends again and that makes me sad.
just talk to me.
we can't hang out. its too late
it was nice talking to you the other night, i think i will enjoy getting to know you.
i wish we had talked a little more before class ended.
you give me something to look forward to.
i had a dream about you and it was weird because weve never officially met.
don't tell me were going to be together again someday. it was weird that you said that.
i dont think you like me very much because that night i met you at his party, but i secretly think you're cool and want to get to know you.
you can do way better. i know it. you know it.
you say you're a feminist yet you have that whole princess locked in a tower thing going on
um you said you wanted to kick my ass and you kind of scared me but i think you're fascinating and beautiful
i love your taste in art/music/movies
i knew that you didnt really like me
im sorry i was an asshole.
you were a great teacher and inspired me to keep writing.
the thought of you not being around anymore breaks my heart, your support means the world to me
im so sorry i ever hurt your trust, even though we dont talk as much anymore, i still think you are amazing.
you wrote so beautifully, what happened to you?
you were the first person to break my heart and im so thankful it was you.
im happy we got to hang out last summer, becoming your friend has been great.
if you hurt her again, i will drive over there and punch you.
you have everything and you can't see that at all.
theres no excuse for cheating on her
your friendship means more to me than you think
you creep me out a little bit
i know you dont like me, and i understand. just dont make him miserable please, he loves you so much.
i always wonder what would have happened if i stayed later that night.
you seem to have grown up a lot.
your energy helps me stay positive.
i do want to talk to you, im just weird and like to stay in my room sometimes.
you are so goofy and i like it.
im worried youre becoming more superficial
i miss hanging out with you
i miss how we used to talk for hours on end and it felt like you were addicted to me.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Laura tagged you in a blog.

is this the only way people keep in contact anymore?

sometimes i just want to delete them, but i feel like thats the equivalent of falling off the face of the earth

and sometimes i want to fall off the face of the earth, 
i dont want to know what everybody in facebook world is up to 

i dont want to look at pictures of people i know, once knew, barely know, dont know 
judge them by their quotes, but i do

yeah and here i am complaining about social networking sites, on my computer
i realize.

maybe i just a miss a simpler time

"Walter Benjamin’s famous essay “The Work of Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction” remains one of the best analyses of this modern ambivalence toward technology. Written in 1935, it stands as an artifact of that ambivalence as well. In speaking of the mechanical reproduction of objects that were once created by hand, Benjamin laments the loss of the original object’s “aura,” its unique situatedness in space and time. What gives that object its aura, Benjamin surmises, is the artist’s relationship to the materials out of which it is made; mechanical reproduction strips the object of that relationship, fetishizing it into instant commodity form."

Sunday, December 7, 2008


i thought these were hilarious
i had fun watching them with you too
i like how you make me feel
at the same time im scared of getting closer to you because of how wonderful you are. 
this week will be really stressful, i have an enormous project due tomorrow and a final on wednesday and all i wanna do is hang out with you.   
ive got red bull, but no you