Sunday, November 12, 2017








Apathy struck 
like a cut l didn’t even

realize was bleeding

.Laura Curren. 



A large coffee stain on my living room carpet 
used to bother me so much. 
Peppermint mocha bullshit. 
Irritating me from the corner of my eye.
l covered it with a decorative box. 
But l knew it was there. 
I’d come back to it & soak it with stain lifters 
& my frustration. l was persistent. 
It lasted through a couple relationships. 
One ex said “you’re never going to get that out. 
You could spend that energy 
cleaning the rest of your house.” 
But l say l don’t work that way! 
I’m always extreme. Either it’s a disaster 
or it’s like it was never there. 
The day the stain finally lifted from beige fibers, 
l smiled at its absence 
& the rest of my messy house.
 “See! l got it out.” 

.Laura Curren.










Crestfallen;
what a beautiful way 
to say 
it didn’t come out the way
I planned.
My head held up by mechanics 
& optimistic humor
has fallen, 
has sunk into a moment.
The deeper I sink 
the more it meant to me. 
Pain becomes my skin 
& I protect it by fighting.
But eventually,
violently, 
then quietly, 
anger leaves me 
& what it meant to me 
rolls down my cheeks.

.Laura Curren.








A large coffee stain on my living room carpet 
used to bother me so much. Peppermint mocha bullshit. Irritating me from the corner of my eye. 
l covered it with a decorative box. But l knew it was there. I’d come back to it to soak it with stain lifters 
& my frustration. l was persistent. 
It lasted through a couple relationships. 
One ex said “you’re never going to get that out. You could spend that energy cleaning the rest of your house.” 
But l don’t work that way! l say. I’m always extreme. 
Either it’s a disaster or it’s like it was never there. 
the day that mess was finally lifted from beige fibers, l smiled at its absence & the rest of my messy home. 
“See! l got it out.” 

.Laura Curren.











At the height of feeling low, 
l once asked whoever or whatever was listening 
that l wouldn’t care as much as l do. 
To take all this everything l feel
& make it muted. Make it nothing. 
Heartbreak & anger & sorrow & romance. 
Everything all at once. 
I’m everything all at once. 
Then apathy struck 
like a cut l didn’t even realize was bleeding. 
The colors in my heart left
& l became a host to vacancy. 
But even when silent screams stopped in my eyes,
even in this blank state of mind, 
l wished to take it all back. 

To feel is to be alive.  

.Laura Curren.









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