i was so nervous to meet his mother
i had heard descriptions that were
intimidating to say the least.
i had heard of all the things she didnt like:
chipped nail polish,
fingerprints on the steel refrigerator handles.
so naturally i checked myself for chips or smudges.
i put my sweaty palms down carefully on my thighs
and sat very ladylike.
i wore a nice blouse
i powdered away the shine and sweat
from my after school face.
i shaved my legs,
i shaved my
keep it private, i'm dating her son.
i picked out the right earrings.
i toned down my sleaziness,
stuffed the swear words back in my mouth.
then she presented me with a test:
a box of donuts; glazed, chocolate, bearclaws.
and how am i supposed to be?
am i supposed to be demure to donuts,
as if i have never met donuts
and i could not formally accept the invitation?
i think of so many girls who would politely shake their head no in this situation.
and i thought briefly of this,
this sugar limbo.
"oh no thank you, im fine"
oh what a lady, she turned down that donut with such grace.
but despite this whole presentation of myself i have for her,
my initial reaction is "oh yeah!"
hear i come, you delicious bearclaw!
and later my boyfriend tells me, after all my fears
that she liked me because i ate the donut