Feeling deep

I feel deeply

And that's great when it's great

But when it's not so

I don't wanna feel at all

The feelings become worse 

When I don't remember them

How or who I felt

it's not healthy

To spit them back up the next morning

And I'll sigh and shake my head 

For myself so others don't have to

Even though they do

 But then there's a moment that strikes me

Pulls at the strings of my feelings that are breathing something beautiful

And I remember those feelings

How could I forget them?

How could I forget

Those feelings  that light a fire in the dark

I'm thankful for

Above all and always love. Love!
and from love you can make a tree of: family, friends, lovers, significant others, coworkers, mentors, teachers.
Shelter. Childhood homes and the one I have now.
Luck. I feel lucky. Thanks.
Food. Having enough. Having it available. Having an absurd selection.
Animals. Loving their presence. The tail wiggles of joy.
Hot showers and hot sex
Words and wishes
Trees and secret spots
Comfortable silences
When I am completely myself
Laughter
and crying too
A forever healing heart
An optimistic outlook
time to myself
stories and inspiration
creativity and imagination
skills waiting to be used
nostalgia
missing someone and being missed
moments of realization
thoughtful gifts
all forms of art
discovering
exploring
wandering
wondering
a life thats never boring

Timing

Oh the timing of things.
It feels so unfortunate
when I thought it could be
something,
something that affects me
greatly.
Maybe I was too:
selfish, impatient, childish,
alcoholic, confused, dependent,
independent, inconsiderate,
insecure,
inexperienced, unexposed,
passive aggressive,
questioning,
obsessive,
unalarmed,
or all of the above.
Maybe I just met you
and you seem really fun and sexy
& our conversation flows as well as our kiss.
It seems like what I was looking for was this,
but something happens,
something is amiss,
and when I peel back the rosy glass
it suddenly seems more stark
and not what I thought.
Oh you're too busy for this?
Well shit.
Maybe we know each other
and your personality colors
my thoughts with possibilities.
My attraction grows.
We hug and I feel more than skin.
We laugh and it feels natural,
and-
Oh, you have a girlfriend?
Of course you do.
Oh, it's complicated?
Of course it is.
All this timing makes me not
want to know the time at all.
Current circumstances
fucking with my chances.
But I have this feeling
that all this timing
won't matter
when that moment comes along,
and all the timing that was wrong
suddenly will seem to have been in its place
when I place a deeper love to a future face.

I could fall in love with you like I do a song.
Without meaning to I can sing along.
I can pretend I know what's going on.
(Oh that's what it's about?)
I could make up my own words.
Oh this whole time I've been singing it wrong?
Explicit content in a subtle manner,
that's what I like.

Not sure I like this when we meet

but the initial intrigue is there.

Somehow your sound 

keeps coming back to my mind.

I'm thinking maybe I'll listen to you more.

I could surround myself in you.

It could be awhile for us, but I might come back.

I could discover lyrics later,
I could hear something different in a year.
I could burn you out through my speakers,
scream your words out of my windows,
let the night drive take you away.
That's it.
You're gone in the mist.
I forgot your number.
Wait, what did you say?
I didn't know this was sad.
I can't get enough,
until that's it,
set fire to it,
overplayed.
No thanks.
I forget about you.
Who's that by again?
but I could hear you
somewhere else later.
Oh I remember that,
when I let you be my soundtrack.