Friday, February 17, 2012

morning expectations

You don't really know anything about a lover until you spend the morning with them.
Legs tangled around each other, morning breath, sleepy eyes, unprepared conversation. then there's breakfast- what do you like, what should we get, do you like coffee, how much sugar, how much cream, are you a carpenter and if so are you capable of carving morning wood?
what should we do today? my, your breasts look wonderful smushed to the side like that and your butt looks so spoonworthy right now. do you like to be touched:? will you bite my fucking head off if I stir you in your sleep? and then questions also have questions buried within each other- if you do like to be cuddled, what sort of touching does that normally entail for you? please dont tell me you like that light fingertip tracing of circles on my back bullshit because id rather you just throw your arm around me in a more direct manner or maybe just press up against me with your boner. i dont need to feel like something is lightly crawling on me to wake me up. and if youre waking me up before 9 am it better be for reasons that will make my lips curl up at the corners. once we are awake, I can only hope that our energy levels will be at a similar speed because I might punch you in the mouth if you proceed to rush me in any sort of way. I also might shun you and have an intimate breakfast with myself if you are acting like you havent seen the sun in years. i dont expect deep conversation but if you can shed some thoughts, thats enough to butter my toast. and if you have early am errands dont expect me to join you, but do expect a kiss goodbye. i do expect a hug and i love you and maybe some mild fondling. i do expect some crazy knotted sex hair from the previous evening. i need coffee too. there doesnt have to be bacon or eggs or bagels but there needs to be coffee. and when im not there, in the morning, will you tell me you wish I was there with you in the morning, wherever you are too? Will I agree that I should be there too?
Will I want to fall asleep on your chest at night and wake up with you again?
Will it be you who I reach for when the world is waking up?
things are so delicate in the morning. things are still settling in from last night, in the morning. things turn into things after being blurs in your sleep and scrambled thoughts uncoil and straighten out to proper functional non drowsy thoughts. maybe you stay drowsy all day and your whole day is delicate. maybe your morning is someone else's night. muscles are sleeping. stomachs not yet growling. eyes not yet opening toward the ceiling. the morning says a lot. it says with smudged eye makeup that its okay what has happened last night because you are okay now and at least rested. its okay who you called or didnt call because there is today and the day is full of promises. the morning is a prelude. prequel. intro. although the morning doesnt include the rest of the day, it can set the tone, so who you share it with is important. "someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning" could also be "someone woke up with the wrong person in bed this morning." we need something, or someone, to look forward to even before our thoughts can shape themselves into coherent, awake sentences...
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