"Why is it that when we see something beautiful or find ourselves in an ideal situation there is a part of us that wants to destroy it or sabotage it??? Is that just the duality of human existence or life as a whole??? Can we never experience good without secretly wanting that same good to be annihilated??? There is something deep inside me (and maybe all of us) that perceives and realizes something pure and positive yet at the same time wishes to indulge in a fury of rage and hate and sabotage the whole thing while knowing I will regret it after the fact. Am I the only one here?? Is this what determines the good people from the bad?? The ability to choose the light over the dark..."
and I said:
im struggling with that idea myself. its hard for people to relax and be happy because they know it can be fleeting so I think rather than have life or some other force beyond their control take it away, they do it first. fucked up defense mechanism.