Sunday, December 11, 2016
Sometimes you know the answer already
but you need someone else to ask the question.
I was drawn to his laugh & the way it bounced
around his ribs & out of his chest,
the way his sorrows pulled his eyes to the ground
& how his hands spilled the words out
through the music he made,
through a touch I craved,
how the concert we went to in the rain made us peel off
our wet clothes & melted our mouths together,
how maybe I could lace lights around his dark
& make him think my love was a night sky to
make him feel alive.
I wanted his sad, the looks in his eyes.
I wanted his warmth around me.
I made excuses for his distance.
I became a therapist in my own head.
My friend could see my deflated pride trying to breathe
whatever promise was left hanging in the air.
She sat & listened to the story of him I built.
She listened to me say, "He's got a lot going on.
He has a lot of stress in his life...he's really busy.
He has a crazy schedule."
Then she turned & looked at me & said,
"Does he know yours?"